Remember when I wrote about what single girl behaviors I would be sacrificing when I moved in with my boyfriend. Well I have an update! We’ve officially been living together for a year and I didn’t really have to sacrifice anything (I still have Beyoncé dance parties). Not only did we survive our first year living together, we just moved into our second apartment! Of course everything wasn’t perfect. I questioned our decision numerous times. However there were more moments I couldn’t imagine us being apart. This isn’t a decision to rush. Once you sign that lease you’re locked in. Over the past year I learned a few things I think would be helpful for anyone thinking of moving in with their partner.
- Learn How to Compromise
Relationships are all about compromise right? NOPE! I say this because I didn’t feel like I ever had to compromise anything until we moved in together. Before living together our compromises seemed so small. Honestly, they were mostly about what we’d eat. I’d want pizza and he’d want a burger, but we agreed to get tacos. Simple stuff. Now our compromises involve purchasing furniture, washing dishes, having guest stay over, etc. You will have to make sacrifices for the greater good of your relationship.
- Communication is Key
Communication changes after you live together. You can’t assume because you see each other everyday that you don’t have to communicate with each other. Sharing a living space with someone actually requires MORE communication. Everything from paying bills to plans for the future will be discussed. No matter the topic it is important to have open and honest communication with your partner.
- Give Each Other Some Space
Some people lose themselves in relationships, especially when you live together. Don’t feel obligated to spend every moment with each other just because you live together. Nobody likes feeling smothered. It’s perfectly normal to want some space from your partner, and you shouldn’t feel guilty if you ask for it. Have a night out with your girls, take a class alone, spend time together separately within your home. Don’t change up your routine now that you live together, maintain a sense of individual identity.
- Don’t Let Yourself Feel Pressure to Take the Next Step
Since I moved in with PJ three of my friends got engaged. Even though I’m beyond happy for them, I can’t help but feel some pressure. PJ and I talked about where our relationship was going before moving in together and mutually decided we were ready to live together. However we don’t plan to take the next step anytime soon. People have expectations of what the next step in a relationship is when you move in together, but their expectations isn’t your reality. Go at your own pace, what is meant for you will happen when the time is right.
What lessons did you learn after living with your partner? Are you feeling pressure from friends and family to take the next step (marriage, babies)? Share below in the comments!