5 Lessons My Dad Taught Me About Love

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My mom always said how overjoyed my dad was when he found out he was having a baby girl, while my mom cowered in fear knowing she would have to do hair. He was the first person to hold me after I was born. He was even the one who named me, telling my mom “you can name the next one” as she recovered from the C-section (sorry mom).  Basically, I had no choice but to be a daddy’s girl, and I’m proud of that. Of course, I love my mother but my relationship with my father is very special. We’re both Leos so our personalities are similar.  He is the reason I love sports, he was my coach for softball, basketball, and soccer. Even today we exchange friendly trash talk when the Redskins and Giants play. Basically we are the same person.

Dad at Redskins stadium

V dad at Giants game

dad and v in vegas

I believe his strong influence during my upbringing has a lot to do with the person I am today. More importantly, my relationship with him has helped guide me in my love life. He never sat me down to talk about boys because he didn’t have to. I learned what I should expect in relationships by watching how he treated my mom. It is because of him I know how to create a true partnership with someone. This partnership is based on 5 things:

  1. Friendship- my parents started out as friends before they got married. After being a couple officially for two weeks my dad proposed to my mom. Whenever I tell this story people look at me crazy but I emphasize that they were friends before. I’m a firm believer in being friends with your partner because at the end of the day if you don’t at least have friendship you don’t have a strong foundation for your relationship.
  2. Patience- my dad is one of the most patient people I know. He keeps a level head in all situations and does not let his emotions get the best of him. I am not a patient person at all and in my relationship it can be a source of tension. I’m working on it and he is a great example for me to follow.
  3. Support-emotional support is a major key for any relationship. I have seen him continue to support my mom throughout their marriage. From weight loss to getting her PhD he has been her number one cheerleader. I want somebody to be in the same role for me.
  4. Equality- I don’t believe in traditional gender roles in a relationship because of my parents marriage. There is no “she cooks and cleans” while he pays the bills and does yard work. Tasks are divided equally and the financial responsibility is equally shared. Some of my favorite dishes are ones my dad made.
  5.   Acceptance- He loves my mom unconditionally for who she is. He has never tried to change her, force her hand, or influence her in a negative way. He lets her be an independent woman outside of their relationship. I can’t picture myself being with someone who wouldn’t do the same for me.

V dad at church

My parents will be celebrating 30 years of marriage in November (#relationshipgoals). Part of their success is because of the reasons mentioned above. Father’s do not always get the credit they deserve but I try to show mine as often as possible how much I appreciate him. I am the woman I am today because of my dad.

What did your dad teach you about love? Share below in the comments!

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3 Comments

  1. Great post! I’m happy you have a great relationship with your Dad and he influenced who you are. My Dad was old-school and I learned three things from him. He was our father not our best friend. He didn’t give us everything we asked for, but we lacked for nothing and most importantly actions speak louder than words. Anyone could make a flowery speech, he backed things up. If we needed him. he was there for us.

  2. This is so beautiful, nothing quite like a father-daughter bond! Me and my dad love going to gigs together, we’ve been to 11 weekend-long music festivals together and regularly swap music – in fact he often tells me about new bands rather than the other way around! He’s hardworking which is a massive inspiration, very funny and is always there for a pep talk. My favourite quote of his is about tackling large projects – “when barbecuing an elephant, it is best done in small chunks’. So true!

    http://victoriaspongepeasepudding.com/

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